Bumper to Bumper: Psychological Shift from Calm to Chaos

I have been driving these past few days, and I have observed myself swearing and getting frustrated. I enjoy driving but this behaviour of mine is new to me. I've been driving on the same road for the past seven years and it used to take a maximum of 15 minutes. However, due to metro construction work since 2019,  the driving time has stretched from 15 minutes to 45 minutes, and sometimes even up to an hour. I've tried many detours using small narrow lanes, but if I was successful once, the second time, I got badly stuck. I also tried the train but the station is far from both home and school, and it's only a one-stop ride so it doesn't help much. 

How has it affected my psyche over time? I dread taking my vehicle out while returning from school. I mentally prepare myself to spend at least 30 minutes on the road, going bumper to bumper. I know that if I blink for a second, another vehicle is going to grab my space, so I have to stay alert every second. 

Last month, I was in Tirupati and we hired a driver to take us from Chennai to Tirumala. He was driving smoothly but I felt he wasn't speeding when the road was empty. Being used to bumper-to-bumper driving, I shared my thoughts and he took it very personally. In retrospect, I realized he was right; there was no need to rush as we were on time but the past experiences had made me impatient. 

What about my observations on the road over the past few years? It's alarming to see people breaking every single rule during the drive. Just yesterday, I was waiting at the signal, a rickshaw rode beside me going half on the footpath and half on the road scratching my vehicle, and running away gleefully. What made it worse was a bunch of bikers enjoying that moment and mocking me. I honestly did not know what to make of this experience. Should I feel aghast that hitting people's cars to make space for oneself is celebrated or feel humiliated that people who rode by made eye contact with me and laughed at my expense? 

Another keen observation is people driving from the opposite side, expecting you to make way for their cars, especially when they know they are in the wrong. This complete disregard for rules and protocol highlights a character who only wishes to serve himself with no regard for others. 

Over the years we have become so self-centered, using our vehicles to fulfill our needs and demands without caring for others. This is a cause of concern because a majority of the vehicles are driven by educated and qualified people. If they are exhibiting signs of self-centredness, disregard for rules, and 'I' over 'We' mentality then you can imagine where we are taking the nation. 

My sincere request to the government and road officials is to please not dig up all roads at once. The impact is not just on the driving time but also on the fabric of society, where people justify their roles and unfair acts simply because they wish to be in a particular place at a particular time. 

In my previous blog, I highlighted the need for bridging the gap between education and culture, and even today, I urge you all to do the same. We are a population of 1.4 billion with 24% in the age bracket of 0 to 14 years. There is huge potential for change if we all come together - Government, Educational institutions, boards, teachers, parents, and students, - and hold values above academics.  

Do share your personal experience and your journey. 

"From Education to Culture: Bridging the Gap"

I recently attended a conference and heard a retired Supreme Court judge mention in his speech that the number of criminal, cybercrime, and domestic violence cases has increased, and the majority of them are committed by educated people. Yes, educated people, but not cultured people. We are not promoting culture within our organizations and that is more paramount. That statement hit me hard. I checked the statistics with the article from Business Standard. The significant escalation in reported cases is evident from 2019 to 2024, with 26,049 complaints recorded in 2019, 257,777 in 2020, 452,414 in 2021, 966,790 in 2022, 1,556,218 in 2023, and 740,957 in the first four months of 2024 alone. 

That very evening, I was catching a flight back home. While boarding, the staff announced the zones for people to queue up. My zone was announced first, and while we were in line, the staff announced that the next zone could join the boarding line. To my dismay, well-dressed people just jumped the line and pushed towards the gate. I simply could not fathom the behavior as it was obvious they could see that we were already in line. I did try to talk to them but the effort could have been more successful. Moreover, didn't they realize that the flight wouldn't leave without taking every passenger?

The judge's line resonated even more: "Most people are educated but not cultured." As an educator, I meet people around the clock. My work deals with human emotions. Over the years, I have observed a shift. Most people want an instant response when they send an email or want a document stamped. They send messages at odd hours and expect immediate action. They are also quick to believe everything they hear without even once confirming it with the other side.

Recently, a parent couple came barging into the office asking for me. I was busy watching the annual day practice, so my office staff asked them to wait. They immediately started screaming and ranting that it was meeting time, so I should be available. The next thing they asked for was the class teacher, who was busy in class. While they were waiting, they caught the teacher moving from one class to another and spoke agitatedly. In the meantime, I walked back into my cabin and asked for the parents who were creating a ruckus. The parents entered very aggressively and introduced themselves as people in very high positions and so on. Their concern was that their child was unhappy because they believed a few students were bullying him and the other students should be given some value education classes. We called for the teacher.  

Now hear her version: the child has many friends. The previous week, the child had a fight with a friend and thus did not want to come to school. The child has now made up with the friend and is smiling. So, the child simply gave an excuse. After this interaction, I made sure that the parents realized their actions and what kind of role models they were becoming for their children. They came angry but left laughing at their outburst. The concern here is having only one child and pampering them so much that now it has become difficult for us to watch them cry.

Our students left for educational excursions this week, and Std. III students left for Pune by bus. On the main road, the bus honked at a scooter many times to move from right to left as it wanted to pick up speed. The lady on the scooter got so angry that she came in front of the bus and refused to move until the driver came down and she could slap him. The teachers folded their hands and requested the lady to let the bus move as there were 40 children around age 8. She refused to understand, and finally, after two hours, the police had to be called in, and then the bus got permission to move. Seriously, I have yet to comprehend this conduct. What did she gain from this entire incident? An apology was already rendered; why was there a need to get physical? Once again, educated but not cultured.

Shouting and screaming give you no results; in fact, they take away from your cultured behavior. Additionally, you have already fallen low in front of the people you are addressing. Message to note, 'Your power does not come from your position but from your humility'.

                              

On the other hand, I have seen ordinary people command respect simply through their presence because they foster a culture of peace and love. They inspire others to view life with meaning and treat one another with kindness and respect. My sincere request to all institutions and organizations is to prioritize a culture of respect over money and status. Invest in building this culture and bridge the gap, as the memories of how you make others feel will endure far longer than your physical presence.

References: 

1. Singh, R. (2024, May 27). Here is how much Indians lost to cyber frauds between Jan and Apr of 2024. Business Standard. Retrieved from https://www.business-standard.com/india-news/here-is-how-much-indians-lost-to-cyber-frauds-between-jan-and-apr-of-2024-124052700151_1.html

Build your STEM Competency through AI - Part 1

Open any search engine or social media tool, and you'll find AI popping up everywhere. It's tempting to explore it, but there's also a sense of apprehension about the unknown. As a Physics teacher, it reminds me of Lenz's Law, which states that the direction of induced current in a conductor by a changing magnetic field is such that the induced current opposes the change in the initial magnetic field. Simply put, when AI gets close, you may want to distance yourself, but when it's far away, curiosity draws you back in.  

The big question on every educator's mind is how?  Let me start with my humble beginning simply by navigating the net and attending a few webinars. 

The OECD webinar, 'How teachers can use AI effectively' shared some good insights. My friend, Vineeta Garg showed great MS Teams tools under assignments like learning accelerators for reading progress, speaker progress, and search progress to enhance class experiences. Do explore it and hope it supports language learning within your classrooms. 

It is my exploration that revealed to me the magic of AI. 

1. Presentations - I stumbled upon the app, 'gamma ai' and to have it create a presentation for me within minutes was phenomenal. Moreover, it is free and you can create 5 presentations. You can upload your own PPT and get it modified. You can even create websites or documents. You can increase the number of presentations by referral. The link to the app is gamma.app  Initially, I felt like a child playing with it, discovering what more it could do for me. I've shared a small video below, but believe me, the potential is even greater. 

2. Classroom content and assessments - The next AI tool an educator, truly enjoyed is MagicSchool AI. It offers a free version for 15 days and then you need to pay but the benefits are enormous. Create lesson plans on 5E's, create assessments, create rubrics, create questions related to real life in Math, simulate science experiments, address misconceptions, and even access a free course to guide you. My video below will demonstrate the vast benefits. 

3. Video generator - The next app is Pictory AI and it can create a video for your class from scripts, from articles, and also help you edit recorded videos. Many of my colleagues have created videos on the workings of a roller coaster to show the laws of physics. Why don't you dabble in and create some exciting videos for your class? 

I recently conducted a teacher training session at my school, bringing together educators from across the city to share insights on AI integration. The response was overwhelmingly positive. This enthusiasm signals a future where we will cultivate a group of teachers proficient in balancing AI tools with social-emotional learning (SEL). This blend will ensure that education becomes truly inclusive and impactful for all students.

A word of caution: AI can create content and visuals, but it may not always be 100% accurate. As the expert, it's crucial to verify the content yourself. Use AI to help you reduce the effort spent on routine tasks, allowing you to focus more on supporting your students' social-emotional learning (SEL) and achieving their learning goals.

Additionally, be aware that AI-generated images often portray people as attractive and slim, which does not reflect the diversity of the real world. Addressing this bias in your classes is important.

In our next blog, we will explore more AI tools that can help alleviate your workload.

"Navigating Teenage Turbulence: A Parent's Guide to Overcoming Challenges and Building Stronger Bonds"

Consider the scenario in a school. It is an Open House for senior secondary students, and Raj has not performed well in his academics. His assignments are never on time and he idles away his time on his mobile. The parents are called along with the students and requested to ensure their wards are consistently studying. The response you expect is 'YES, we will ensure' but the response you receive is 'Raj does not listen to us, please look into the matter'. 

There is a helplessness expressed by the parents that is so palpable. 

Similarly, when you talk to educators or people in the community, they all voice the same concerns. In the past decade or so, the parents did show some control but over the years, there has been a struggle to cope. How did we arrive here? 

Now let's visit a regular family with young children or a single child in most cases. The child, let's call him Raj is the center of their parent's affection. Both parents are highly protective of Raj and thus everyone else is excluded from ever disciplining the child because they have taken complete responsibility and shielded their ward. So, when the child is sent to school or classes any minor inconvenience becomes a squabble with the authorities. Every attempt to address behaviour or attitude is reviewed as denial or targeting. Eventually, every party involved lays down any claim as peace is preferred. Over a period, everyone begins to accept this behaviour of the parents too because the ward belongs to the parents and they have the best interests of the child in mind.  

Now perceive this from the child's angle. Raj observes that he matters immensely to his parents, he follows his parents and anyone else who claims otherwise is not to be heard. His world has narrowed down to his parents and himself. So, when his teachers say something, the neighbors complain, and the elderly advise he might acknowledge it but he will look to his parents only for confirmation. 

Fast forward by a few years, the parents observe that Raj is spending more time with his friends, he demands electronic gadgets and gets very upset with them when it is not offered. There is a lot of emotional drama when he is denied anything or asked to study. The parents find it very difficult to handle Raj because where he kept them at the centre of everything now they are completely sidelined. His desires and pleasures are all that matter to him. He has begun to care only about himself. 

In fact, the article,  'The Teen Brain Tunes in Less to Mom's Voice, more to Unfamiliar Voices' published on April 28, 2022 - By Erin Digitale resonates with this behaviour “Just as an infant knows to tune into her mother’s voice, an adolescent knows to tune into novel voices,” said lead study author Daniel Abrams, PhD, clinical associate professor of psychiatry and behavioral sciences. “As a teen, you don’t know you’re doing this. You’re just being you: You’ve got your friends and new companions and you want to spend time with them. Your mind is increasingly sensitive to and attracted to these unfamiliar voices.”

Perceive it from Raj's end. Raj now has friends, he has access to technology, he is consistently on his mobile and social network and confident that his behaviour and attitude are acceptable. His parents have endorsed it. As he grows, he is exploring more and perhaps driven more by hormonal changes. He now perceives his parents as friends rather than an authority and does not appreciate interference. He believes he knows what he has to do. 

 

Today the parents are helpless, and isolated and look up to everyone for support but Raj has already realized that the support team is something he does not need to heed. 

How do we help him reflect on himself when he feels he has done nothing wrong? How do we get him to trust an outsider's advice? 

Here's my view on the issue. 

1. Begin with Positive discipline: Positive Discipline is a program developed by Dr. Jane Nelsen. It is based on the work of Alfred Adler and Rudolf Dreikurs and designed to teach young people to become responsible, respectful and resourceful members of their communities. Positive Discipline teaches important social and life skills in a manner that is deeply respectful and encouraging for both children and adults (including parents, teachers, childcare providers, youth workers, and others). 

One way of instilling it is having your ward intern with NGOs, NPOs, and social welfare departments. The sensitivity inculcated through the case studies is phenomenal. Moreover, it will teach him rigour and resilience. 

2. Modeling of behaviour - Modeling is one way in which behavior is learned. When a person observes the behavior of another and then imitates that behavior, he or she is modeling the behavior. This is sometimes known as observational learning or social learning.

To help Raj, parents need to show Raj that they respect the school policies, and the advice of the grandparents and well-wishers. Only when they start believing and expressing positive thoughts, will the child model it. 

3. Bring in Holistic education - As parents, the focus is more on marks than behaviour and that is where we all go wrong. We have given intellectual quotient so much importance that the other quotients have been negated. My friend Swaroop Rawal talks of six quotients in her YouTube video on 'Holistic Education & the ‘whole’ child'. She stresses AQ and SQ also called the 'Dharmic quotient' to support value education. Every religion teaches harmony, respect for elders and compassion so read some good stories. As parents, we should emphasize school and community celebrating a student's proficiency and talent apart from academic achievement. This mindset shift is mandatory to create a generation of students who care for others, the environment, and themselves. 

4. Seek professional support - Schools have counselors who can observe the child at school and collaborate with parents to offer the right counsel. Parents can also connect with psychologists outside the school premises if they need further support. 

I believe in 'OUR STUDENTS' profusely and have faith in them.

As an educator, I have observed over the years that students today are much more intellectual, committed, and caring in the right environment.  All they need is a nudge in the right direction from us working as a team, and a commitment to balance their time between gadgets, social media, and OTT and building all their 6 quotients as mentioned in the image. 

इन्द्रियाणि पराण्याहुरिन्द्रियेभ्यः परं मनः।
मनसस्तु परा बुद्धिर्यो बुद्धेः परतस्तु सः॥ ३-४२

The senses are superior to the gross body, and superior to the senses is the mind.
Beyond the mind is the intellect, and even beyond the intellect is the soul.

THE SOUL REIGNS SUPREME

Lessons from the past - Chola Dynasty

Like every second person, I love movies. Whenever I begin watching them, I am so immersed that my family often complains that my attention towards the movie is so undivided that I do not listen to anything they say or mention. Recently, I watched Ponniyan Selvan and I was hooked. The plot, the twists, the cinematography, and the costumes took me back to that era. The way it was directed, presented, and enacted by the actors was another highlight and I eagerly watched the second part. Moreover, it drove me to learn more about the Chola Dynasty. 

Let me share that I was intrigued by the history shown in the movie but not everything shown in the movie is true. 

Source:https://m.media-amazon.com/images/S/pv-target-images/7e25f103214ea7116adf106e3762b591a2b46469377bc310b5983dbeb623a0f4.jpg

So let's explore what we can take from the empire and use it in present-day life. The Cholas ruled from the 9th to the 12th century AD. If you refer to the book, Ancient India by S. Krishnaswami Aiyangar, Cornell University Library, you learn how the kingdom came to be. 

It was King Rajaraja who ascended the throne in 969 A.D. conquered territories and became master of the Tamil country south of the Pennar. He was so devoted to his work that he did not let a single opportunity pass by him to ascertain power and defeat the Chalukyas. His son, Rajendra took over after him and expanded the empire and successive rulers maintained the glory.  They were excellent at maritime knowledge and capitalized on their supremacy over the seas making them formidable at sea wars. 

The strength of the kingdom was its governance. The administration was highly systematized from an early date. The Head of the state was the king with state officials and ministers as shown in the image. 

For administration purposes, the kingdom was divided into several administrative units called 'mandals' with respective sects of people governing the areas. Different sects of people governed different areas to bring in more regulations. What was most appreciable was that the village councils, 'sabhas' enjoyed autonomy with minimal interference from the king. Further, the courts to impart justice gave out judgments based on evidence. 

This is somewhat comparable to our present democratic government across the world. So why was the governance lauded to date and celebrated even today?  Why do we seek to make movies of the past when the countries today have systems with the latest technology and access to resources? 

If you analyze the information shared, two prominent conclusions can be drawn:

1. Process hierarchy - All the officials were governed by another set of officials and the guidelines were clear where they abided by the rules of the constitution. Training and monitoring play an important role in every system within the governing bodies so that each individual is aware of their roles, their outreach, and the scope and boundary of their powers. Institutions should invest in consistent training and third-party monitoring to get real-time feedback on their performance. 

2. Autonomy and minimal interference - You need to trust the person you have engaged for the role and allow them to experiment and explore. You need to give them a boundary where few errors can be accepted and where no mistakes will be tolerated. For example where the life of any individual is threatened then no lapses will be entertained but an event arrangement lacking coordination or quality can be let off with guidelines and feedback. Allow the person to make decisions and learn from the consequences without a feeling of guilt and remorse as David Ogilvy mentions, "Leaders grasp nettles"

We observe micromanaging by the Heads at many institutions and it does not allow leadership to flourish. In fact most parts of the world, we are experiencing a serious lack of strong leadership role models and we observe people in old age still leading countries. Why do we not see the dynamic youth leading from the front? 

This is a serious concern and the Ministry of Education and educational institutions need to take cognizance. For starters, educators need to create projects for students where they share their leadership icon of today stating the attributes that make the person a great leader and comparing it with a leader of the past. Let the students role-play, criticize, or even rewrite what they felt the leader should have done better. Get students to create portfolios where they conduct research on how to create leaders for the nation with a 10-year plan.   

While closing, I would want to share that movies can be a starting cause but how we use it is all our perspective. I am happy to learn about the Cholas which I never did take seriously during my school days so kudos to the entire movie team. At the same time, post the research, the students could also be asked to review the movie and analyze the facts and the fiction. 

References:

1. Unveiling the Lost Pages of History: The Forgotten Cholas and Other Indian Dynasties......

Read more at: https://organiser.org/2023/06/12/178492/bharat/unveiling-the-lost-pages-of-history-the-forgotten-cholas-and-other-indian-dynasties/

2. Ancient India - https://www.rarebooksocietyofindia.org/book_archive/196174216674_10154712353641675.pdf

We all need a Mentor in life

We walk on our path and there comes a time when we don't know where to look further. There are crossroads at times, obstacles looming over us and sometimes our own insecurities gnawing at us making us stand still. At that time, imagine an experienced, loving individual knowing our strengths and shortcomings walking toward us, holding our hand, and showing us the path ahead. Sounds awesome, doesn't it? Well, that person is our mentor. A mentor who believes in us invests time in us and with their vast background of knowledge shows numerous possibilities to rise. The rise may not always be professional but also personal. 

In 1997, I was going through a bitter divorce and times were tough. My parents were extremely supportive but the barrage of relatives throwing negative remarks was draining us of all hopes and peace. It was not allowing me to think of any kind of future. I felt I was sinking into a hole with no light at the end of the tunnel. I had lost confidence and began doubting myself. Suddenly my friends were no more inviting me, and my presence was not a requisite. At that time, my father called his sister, my beautiful aunt from Kolkatta known for her affable nature and immense positivity to come to Mumbai to take me to her place. She felt a change of place would do me good. Every day, she would share positive things about me like 'You are so intelligent, you can be anything; 'You are much stronger than you think you are; 'You have sharp features, anyone will love your looks'. Her ever-smiling face, seeing the good in people, and her belief that everything happens for a reason started rubbing off on me. 

Consistently, over two months, her words and actions started doing magic with me, I developed an inner strength to face the world with my head held high. I came back to Mumbai, started my studies again, and joined teaching as a profession. With every step, my confidence grew and I started experimenting and exploring moving to leadership positions and teacher training.  Today with my soulmate married for over 22 years and a loving son, achieving a National Award for teachers, I know there is more to come. My relationship with my aunt is ever so strong and sharing a recent photograph where she is beaming with love. 

Over the course of the years, many mentors walked in shaping my professional growth like Usha Bhatia Ma'am, Seema Sheikh Ma'am, and Sangeeta Gole to whom I will always be grateful. 

History has shown that every great thought leader, businessman, and scientist had mentors who inspired them to become the best version of themselves. How can anyone forget Lord Krishna being the ideal mentor in Arjuna's life helping him reflect on his actions and resolve deep-rooted fears, and belief systems, and take control of himself. In the battle of Kurukshetra, he showed the mirror to Arjuna, the best warrior,  saddled with conflicts preventing him from action and delivering. 

Take another example of Oprah Winfrey and Maya Angelou. 

Excerpts from Oprah.com

The woman Oprah calls mentor-mother-sister-friend offers wise words about the roots of confidence, the trouble with modesty and how to do the impossible. Since the moment I opened I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings, I've felt deeply connected to Maya Angelou. With each page, her life seemed to mirror mine: In her early years she was raised by her grandmother in the South; as a young girl she was raped; and, like me, she grew up reciting what the church folks called little pieces—a few lines from the Bible that were usually delivered amid shouts and amens from the women fanning themselves in the front pews. Meeting Maya on those pages was like meeting myself in full. For the first time, as a young black girl, my experience was validated. And it still is, only now I sit at Maya's feet, beside her fireplace, hardly believing that, years after reading Caged Bird, she is my mentor and close friend. When we met in Baltimore more than 20 years ago, our bond was immediate. We talked as if we had known each other our entire lives; and throughout my twenties and in the years beyond, Maya brought clarity to my life lessons. Now we have what I call a mother-sister-friend relationship. She's the woman who can share my triumphs, chide me with hard truth and soothe me with words of comfort when I call her in my deepest pain.

The next question is obviously, how do I find this mentor? The Mentoring skills model given below helps us to identify the skills a mentor should have. It explains the skills both the mentors and mentees should display to achieve the maximum from a relationship. 

 

Do mentors walk that easily in life? Well yes and no. Yes, you will have to look and look hard. Sometimes, they are there in front of our eyes, but our busy schedules have prevented us from looking around or even focusing on building our future. 

No, when we feel we already know everything. Sometimes our egos blind us into believing we are already the best or we are too insecure to share that we need guidance. All I can say is that if I am growing, it is because I had great teachers and significant mentors. 

Poem - Cars driving on a highway

Ever wondered how cars moving on a highway are similar to people walking into your life?

Some drive alongside you peacefully for ages;

Some drive past you without a second glance;

Some respectfully  let you overtake, valuing your speed ;

Some annoyingly get into your way for a dumb thrill ;

Some zig-zag undeniably to reach their destination while

Some create tantrums and traffic and slow you down.

Some out of spite  and inner insecurities break all rules;

While some follow the rules so soundly to create a safe haven.

Whether the journey is for a moment or a lifetime, it definitely leaves a mark.